Can you tell us a bit about your journey to parenthood?
Our desire for a child probably started similarly to many others! When we felt everything was in place, I stopped taking the pill, thinking it might take some time, but I would probably be pregnant the following year. This was followed by several years of trying, using cycle apps and ovulation tests. After about three years, we began the first examinations and visited a fertility specialist.
That’s when our path with fertility treatments began. It took a total of 8 years, with 10 ICSIs and 4 pregnancy losses, before we could hold our little miracle in our arms!
We never found a reason why it didn't work out or why I lost our babies so early.
10 IVF cycles– how did you persevere for so long?
The main reason was and still is our strong partnership! We took care of each other, took breaks, spent conscious time as a couple, had many conversations, and sought support, although we only found it periodically.
Our surroundings – family and friends – also provided us with great support!
What fears and worries did you have during the years of trying to conceive and undergoing artificial inseminations? Did any of these come true?
The main fear or worry was certainly the classic one: never getting pregnant and being able to hold our baby in our arms. With the repeated pregnancy losses, there was also the fear of never being able to experience a pregnancy until birth and a healthy baby!
In the end, these fears did not come true – we were able to hold our wonderful daughter in our arms after our long journey!
How did the desire for a child affect you and your environment? What changed?
The longer the desire for a child lasted, the harder it often became – I often felt lonely and alone. Depending on the results we received, the emotional lows were often very deep, making it difficult to keep or even find hope again.
Our closest friends understood and supported us wherever they could. The greatest understanding came from companions with similar fates. In the work environment, the situation was often difficult, as I was open about our journey. It often fluctuated between understanding and lack of understanding, because the longer our journey lasted, the harder it was to deal with disappointment and grief.
I increasingly chose and considered to whom I told my story and journey.
Were there moments when you lost hope of becoming pregnant and holding a healthy baby? If so, how did you cope?
Unfortunately, these moments occurred repeatedly. The first and biggest shock was certainly after our first ICSI. The treatment worked perfectly, and I became pregnant right away; the heartbeat was also detected in the 9th week. The shock came at the next examination in the 11th week when I went to collect the mother-child pass – the doctor could no longer detect a heartbeat. This news completely pulled the ground from under my feet.
After this first major shock, a positive pregnancy test was always accompanied by much caution, and ultrasound appointments were filled with a lot of tension.
I always tried to take good care of myself and choose my surroundings wisely. Conversations with my husband and my doctor always helped me address fears and worries and not let them become overwhelming. The success of this was very variable!
The longer our journey lasted, the more the carousel of thoughts increased. I then also sought an occupation to stop or at least slow down the carousel!
What did you wish for the most during your long journey to parenthood? What would have supported you?
Support that is by my side from the beginning. Someone who can be asked questions or simply written to when in despair and also receives support quickly. A point of contact for me and my worries!
Your journey to parenthood led you to a new professional path – how did that come about?
When I was on maternity leave with my wonderful daughter, I became acutely aware of how lucky I was and how fortunate I was to have my husband and our doctors by my side. Not everyone has this luck – often, there is simply no one to talk to. That's why I decided to train as a life and social counselor.
Since it is often a big hurdle for many women to seek support through psychotherapy, it is important to me to offer a different option as a life and social counselor!
During this training, something very unexpected happened, as I became pregnant twice without IVF! Unfortunately, the pregnancies did not last, and the second one ended in a small birth at home, meaning I delivered our baby at home in the 10th week. An experience that was very healing for us! As a result, I decided to do additional training specifically for support after miscarriages, because it occurs very frequently in the context of infertility, and there are even fewer support services available.
For me, this combines the important knowledge from my training and the many years of experience from my own journey to parenthood!
How do you support women with a desire for children and those who have experienced miscarriages? Is there a typical process? How do you provide the support you wished you had back then?
My support is individually structured – depending on what the woman needs at that moment! There are group programs, or we create completely individual single packages for the support!
I also use energy work in my support – both individual and group – if desired, to get the energy in the body flowing better, dissolve non-beneficial emotions, and much more to bring more calmness to the path to parenthood.
For individual support, there are 1:1 appointments online or in person in the 22nd district of Vienna.
Between the 1:1 appointments, I also provide support via chat – when unfavorable news comes or the carousel of thoughts spins too much, providing short-term support!
In my group programs, there are also online sessions, a Telegram group for exchange, and always energetic support.
So that women no longer have to go through their journey to parenthood alone, I support them comprehensively with the expertise and knowledge from my training and my own experience!
Did you have experience with energy work on your journey to parenthood? Did it help you?
On my journey, I had some experience with receiving energy work – mainly with Reiki (a technique of laying on hands from Japan), because my husband can do it and supported us this way. It helped me, calmed me, and gave me confidence.
Now I apply energetic tools myself and continue to learn. It’s simply fascinating how this remote support can help in various life situations – whether it’s for tension because everything is too much, to bring more peace to agitated thoughts, or simply to see what the body needs at the moment … the possibilities are so diverse!
What would you advise couples who are just beginning their journey to parenthood and perhaps facing their first IVF treatment?
Engage with what feels good to you and what can help you. Think early on about whether and what kind of support (outside of medical) can help you! This can make many things easier: making decisions, finding solutions together, dealing with acute stresses (e.g., well-meant comments, ...), ...
What should be the focus during the journey to parenthood?
I find that this is very individual and can be different for every woman, depending on what feels right.
For me, it was always hope. Often, it wasn't easy to maintain it, but I always managed to do it again. I always started a new IVF attempt with hope – it made me feel good and gave me the strength and courage to handle it.
How can people contact you?
I can be reached directly via email at christina@im-vertrauen-begleiten.at, through my website www.im-vertrauen-begleiten.at, or on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/christinasiebinger/!
